McCain: Noone Is Uninsured

Yes, you read that right. Not directly from McCain, but rather one of the guys that wrote his health care plan, John Goodman, president of the National Center for Policy Analysis. Mr. Goodman says that no American is uninsured because they have access to the ER at any hospital - which, by law, cannot turn a patient away for inability to pay.

Mr. Goodman also says that the Census Bureau is the leading culprit of the "crisis."

"So I have a solution. And it will cost not one thin dime," Mr. Goodman said. "The next president of the United States should sign an executive order requiring the Census Bureau to cease and desist from describing any American – even illegal aliens – as uninsured. Instead, the bureau should categorize people according to the likely source of payment should they need care.

"So, there you have it. Voila! Problem solved."

That's right fellow American's, the problem, once again, is all in your head. You really are insured. So just head over to the local ER for that checkup you've been needing for a while, or that liver transplant that has been ordered. Be sure you look sick though, because the ER can turn you away if you don't appear to need "immediate care."